So I've been kinda seeing a long time on again off again ex-girlfriend for the last couple of weeks. Problem is that she introduced me to a smokin hot friend (smart too, smart is sooooo sexy to me) of hers that seems to be in to me and I could definitely be in to her, if you know what I mean.
How do I proceed? The current girl and I aren't really serious, we just kind of get together if there is nothing better to do. Can I go after the friend or is that a violation?
__________________ Willing is not enough, we must do. Knowing is not enough, we must apply.
--Bruce Lee
I say approach the friend and see if there is an interest. If there is and the two of you hit it off, then you can discuss whether or not that will affect things with your ex and, if so, how to approach that. A big factor is whether or not she is your ex because you both decided there wasn't anything there. If you broke it off but deep down she still wants to make a go of it and goes along with the relationship of convenience in the hopes that you'll change your mind, that would cause problems with trying to pursue her friend.
Just my $0.02
__________________ FLY NAVY
Christianity neither is, nor ever was a part of the common law.
-Thomas Jefferson, letter to Dr. Thomas Cooper, February 10, 1814
Well I'm pretty sure that neither of us have any misconceptions about giving the relationship another shot, but I do definitely care for her.
If I apply the golden rule and reverse our positions, would I be pissed if she got with one of my boys? I'm not real sure, depends on who, some of my boys are kind of dirty, lol. But if she was happy I guess I wouldn't really have too much of a problem with it.
But does she feel the same way? I'm not sure. I'm not terribly intuitive when it comes to women and jealousy.
__________________ Willing is not enough, we must do. Knowing is not enough, we must apply.
--Bruce Lee
The only way you will know for sure is by asking the current girl what she thinks... although depending on what kind of chicky she is, she may not answer you directly
How close of friends are they? Does it seem like the friendship could be strained if you go for the other girl? Also, are you willing to lose the current girl if you do go for the other one?
How close of friends are they? Does it seem like the friendship could be strained if you go for the other girl? Also, are you willing to lose the current girl if you do go for the other one?
I do think that it would strain their relationship initially. How long is the big question. Like I said though I definitely do care for the ex. I've known her since high school and would have a hard time if she were to decide to cut off our friendship. She might be the only person on the planet that I actually trust implicitly.
So to sum up. No, I'm not willing to lose the ex as a friend. I do think that their friendship might suffer initially, but I also think that it would settle down after everyone got comfortable with the situation.
Is this why nice guys finish last?
__________________ Willing is not enough, we must do. Knowing is not enough, we must apply.
--Bruce Lee
Every girl I have ever went out with has either told me that she want to have my child or wants to marry me
Therefore, I have not stayed friends with any of my ex's - and it was all their call. - I don't know how I find the crazy ones - or how the crazy ones find me....
anyway, if you go out with someone and break up.... I am a strong believer that you SHOULD NOT ever get back together. now with that said.. there should be no reason you can't go out with one of her friends - whom she introduced you to in the first place!!
If you are that scared about loosing the X as a friend.. then you can talk to her first. Say I want that other girl and not you... how do you feel about that - well ---- not in those exact words, but you get the idea. . .
Now if it was a (guy) friend's ex, then it's definitely off limits. Not really sure about the whole woman thing, you'd need to get some input from the girls.
This brings to mind the Seinfeld episode about the switch out. You should proceed with George Costanza's 3-some ploy.
__________________
Now I'm just laid bad - G35Princess
R.I.P. MBC
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What would you do?
- well ---- not in those exact words, but you get the idea. . .
