I also hadn't realized that he has so much anger management issues.
I'm sorry to say it, but I think you're better off without him.
yeah, i didn't realize that at first... that's bad news. he REALLY needs a serious talk to - that is very disrespectful to you and the relationship (and himself)
i am for some reason interested to see how that "talk" went....
__________________
08 G37 6MT | PlatGraph | Nav | 15% | TEIN H Tech
04 Cpe 6MT | DG | Nav | 20% | TEIN S Tech | Volk GT7
Well the talk didn't go all that well or all that bad either. We didn't get anything figured out except that there are issues that we need to work on. He still swears that I am cheating or am going to cheat. I told him that hasn't happened and isn't going to. I told him I wanted to do those questionaires and he said "maybe" this weekend. Well I know that won't happen because he'll want to go out to the clubs and go to friends houses and he will never quite have time to get to them. I am hoping that I can convince him to stay home one night so we can discuss this and get stuff figured out or I don't know what to do anymore. I am so confused.
Well the talk didn't go all that well or all that bad either. We didn't get anything figured out except that there are issues that we need to work on. He still swears that I am cheating or am going to cheat. I told him that hasn't happened and isn't going to. I told him I wanted to do those questionaires and he said "maybe" this weekend. Well I know that won't happen because he'll want to go out to the clubs and go to friends houses and he will never quite have time to get to them. I am hoping that I can convince him to stay home one night so we can discuss this and get stuff figured out or I don't know what to do anymore. I am so confused.
Ggirl, you really need to lose this guy. This kind of behavior never gets better. In fact, it usually just gets worse over time. This isn't love that's motivating his behavior despite what he tells you. Love and a fear of losing you are two completely different things in this case. He is an immature, insecure person and just isn't equipped at this point in his life to handle a grown up relationship. Get out now before he starts trying to control the rest of your life.
Well the talk didn't go all that well or all that bad either. We didn't get anything figured out except that there are issues that we need to work on. He still swears that I am cheating or am going to cheat. I told him that hasn't happened and isn't going to. I told him I wanted to do those questionaires and he said "maybe" this weekend. Well I know that won't happen because he'll want to go out to the clubs and go to friends houses and he will never quite have time to get to them. I am hoping that I can convince him to stay home one night so we can discuss this and get stuff figured out or I don't know what to do anymore. I am so confused.
Ggirl, you really need to lose this guy. This kind of behavior never gets better. In fact, it usually just gets worse over time. This isn't love that's motivating his behavior despite what he tells you. Love and a fear of losing you are two completely different things in this case. He is an immature, insecure person and just isn't equipped at this point in his life to handle a grown up relationship. Get out now before he starts trying to control the rest of your life.
yeah i am in total agreement. i am sorry to say
i am all for "chances" but if you goto him for a serious talk with your concerns of saving the relationship and he is going to sit there and continue to acuse you of cheating... well he has some major issues. about 20 of them. (which i will not list) HA. but really... i think you deserve better. this is sounding tougher and tougher - i don't know what to say to do now....
hmm... i may recommend going for the "break" it sounds needed now. his response sounds horrendous to me.
i'm reallly sorry for your troubles. good luck...
__________________
08 G37 6MT | PlatGraph | Nav | 15% | TEIN H Tech
04 Cpe 6MT | DG | Nav | 20% | TEIN S Tech | Volk GT7
Well the talk didn't go all that well or all that bad either. We didn't get anything figured out except that there are issues that we need to work on. He still swears that I am cheating or am going to cheat. I told him that hasn't happened and isn't going to. I told him I wanted to do those questionaires and he said "maybe" this weekend. Well I know that won't happen because he'll want to go out to the clubs and go to friends houses and he will never quite have time to get to them. I am hoping that I can convince him to stay home one night so we can discuss this and get stuff figured out or I don't know what to do anymore. I am so confused.
If he doesn't want to stay home, then pack an overnight bag and tell him that he can call you when he's ready to sit down and do it. Tell him that you will be at a "friends" house.
[quote="Jaylin
If he doesn't want to stay home, then pack an overnight bag and tell him that he can call you when he's ready to sit down and do it. Tell him that you will be at a "friends" house.[/quote]
Good idea. Oh that would really make him mad he would think the friend was a guy. Sounds good though it may work to make him stay home. Thanks for the idea Jay!
I know you guys are right saying I have to end it. My friends and family say the same thing. Everyone is afraid one of his rages will be against me eventually and although I am a tough girl he outweighs me by like 90 pounds and towers over me. I have never feared for myself though just to be clear about that.
I really want to say Thanks to all of you for giving your input it is really making me think which is what I needed to do. Seeing it in writing makes it easier to understand in a way.
I know you guys are right saying I have to end it. My friends and family say the same thing. Everyone is afraid one of his rages will be against me eventually and although I am a tough girl he outweighs me by like 90 pounds and towers over me. I have never feared for myself though just to be clear about that.
I really want to say Thanks to all of you for giving your input it is really making me think which is what I needed to do. Seeing it in writing makes it easier to understand in a way.
I know from experience that this is one of the hardest things you have ever had to decide on. I think you really did make the right decision, based on what we have heard here - but that doens't make it any easier to carry out. You have a good support system in your friends and family, who you say also see what we have pointed out here, and think this is the right way to go. We wish you all the best here, and know there is someone out there for you - you just haven't met him yet
I know you guys are right saying I have to end it. My friends and family say the same thing. Everyone is afraid one of his rages will be against me eventually and although I am a tough girl he outweighs me by like 90 pounds and towers over me. I have never feared for myself though just to be clear about that.
I really want to say Thanks to all of you for giving your input it is really making me think which is what I needed to do. Seeing it in writing makes it easier to understand in a way.
I know from experience that this is one of the hardest things you have ever had to decide on. I think you really did make the right decision, based on what we have heard here - but that doens't make it any easier to carry out. You have a good support system in your friends and family, who you say also see what we have pointed out here, and think this is the right way to go. We wish you all the best here, and know there is someone out there for you - you just haven't met him yet
Thanks that's sweet of you to say. And yeah it is a hard decision to make but I know it has to be made.
Total sympathy for you...this part is not the fun part of relationships...
hard decision and sometimes even harder to extricate yourself once you say its done. Only one life though...you have a pretty good team in here if not out there as far as support.
Turns out you got the good advise from the guys, not the girls of 6mt...but believe me I and at least twenty of my closest women friends have been right there with you...some of us more than once.
(Kurt - says if you say he owns a Z, I am going to really get freaked out)
No he doesn't have a Z he has a BMW why?
This little tidbit popped up on a Z site. It would have been one of the examples of great (not ha-ha, but wow what are the odds?) cosmic irony if this was your guy.
(Kurt - says if you say he owns a Z, I am going to really get freaked out)
No he doesn't have a Z he has a BMW why?
This little tidbit popped up on a Z site. It would have been one of the examples of great (not ha-ha, but wow what are the odds?) cosmic irony if this was your guy.
(Kurt - says if you say he owns a Z, I am going to really get freaked out)
No he doesn't have a Z he has a BMW why?
This little tidbit popped up on a Z site. It would have been one of the examples of great (not ha-ha, but wow what are the odds?) cosmic irony if this was your guy.